The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize