But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
