he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
