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• (801): View more from Utah

  Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...

  (435): View more from Utah

  A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?

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• (206): View more from Washington

  We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.

  (425): View more from Washington

  It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Too late, I'm convinced it's broken

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• (320): View more from Minnesota

  We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.

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• (207): View more from Maine

  my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain

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• (305): View more from Florida

  God, I missed his penis.

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