oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Randomize
