I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Farmville is her only friend.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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