D3 body, D1 cock
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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