Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
