whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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