My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
it wasn't lemon gatorade
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
