I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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