Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
