My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Randomize
