she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
