Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
