I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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