Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Well I just put wine in my tea
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
