people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
