Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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