I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
