Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Randomize
