Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
