remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
the condom got lost in my hair
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
