You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
