I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
