And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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