Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(817): View more from Texas

Dude. Creed is coming in september.

(1-817): View more from Texas

We're no longer friends.

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(240): View more from Maryland

taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard

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(701): View more from North Dakota

The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.

(406): View more from Montana

And we all know God doesn't like sinners.

(701): View more from North Dakota

Amen.

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(352): View more from Florida

I used to practice getting hit by cars.

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(419): View more from Ohio

You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.

(1-419): View more from Ohio

Um. I literally have no words.

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(817): View more from Texas

I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.

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(301): View more from Maryland

Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass

(240): View more from Maryland

He should have died. Natural selection.

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(360): View more from Washington

I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.

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(716): View more from New York

you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear

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