Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
