he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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