we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
