I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
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