Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
