You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
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