you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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