So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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