she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
