Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
