I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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