the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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