its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
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