she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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