i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
