Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Randomize
