It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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