i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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