found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
