I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
