its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
