did you get engaged???
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
