dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
